Diaries Of a Dirty Open Mic-er - March

Jeeeeezzzeee, March flew by! After the longest January known to man, I seemed to blink, and March was gone. I belong to the Hampshire Comedy Forum. If anybody reads this from outside of there, I recommend that you join—it is full of drama, and well, we all looooveee a bit of drama.

I've been busy working on my show for Edinburgh, which I now have a venue for at the Free Fringe—YAYYYYYYYYY!!!!!I was pooing my pants a little bit for a while. I don’t know why—I could have just gone next year and probably taken a better show. But I had already committed, and it felt like if I didn’t get in, I would never get in. That’s super exciting!

This month, I have done a few previews, and by previews, I mean longer spots that people I know have been nice enough to offer me so I can test out my material over a longer time. And I tell you what, when you have been doing 10s for a while, you get somewhat used to bombing in a 10-minute performance. You learn things that you can do to potentially turn it around—what people are or are not liking, etc.

When you push it to 15, again, not too bad—I’ve done a few of them too. But when you go up and bomb for 20 or 30 minutes, that is a long time to do it! I expected to do those same things to get them back on side, but when you're learning to do a 30, it really throws you off your momentum.

I think that is partly knowing your material, which I don’t fully know yet… I have it written out, but it isn’t locked in, so that makes it difficult. It may not be the same for everyone—some can go out there, and it doesn’t bother them to do a 30 because they have the confidence and delusion that they can do it and do it well. And honestly, I think that can carry them a long way!

I, unfortunately, am super realistic about my ability. When it is bad, I know it's bad, and I cannot fake that it has been good, because for me, it is too embarrassing. But I suppose when you are deluded, you are not faking that it was good. You actually just believe it was good… God, how I would love to have more of that in my life.

There may even be people reading this thinking… nahh, you’re plenty delusional, Sam… to which I say… thanks, guys. I needed that pick-me-up.

I have continued to love gigging all the way through—getting really nice gigs with lovely places and people and working out what I’m going to do and how I’m going to do it. It is the best part of comedy, even if you bomb. The whole journey of it—from the idea, to writing it down, to it not working several different times, to it finally working, to using it in front of a bigger audience and getting a good laugh from it! It’s a beautiful, beautiful thing.

Anyway, enough of my ramblings!

Here are the gigs that I did this month… as usual, for anybody reading, the rating system is 1-10. It is no reflection on the night; it is a reflection on performance. I don’t blame nights—I blame me. There are nights that are challenging for various reasons, but you can’t always expect a perfect night, especially as an open-micer like myself.

The Swan – Can’t remember doing this, but honestly, it could have gone either way. 5/10

Belgium and Blues – New material night, lovely gig. I didn’t MC this one; I had somebody else doing it, and it went very well. 7/10

Joke Smiths – This night was unfortunately good—shame about the host, Lee Smith, who is a personal frenemy of mine! But the gig was good, and I did well. I did have a friend come and watch, and he shouted out one of my punchlines as I told the joke. It’s not the first time this has happened—the last person to do it wasn’t a friend, though. But they’re good and murdered now, so it doesn’t really matter. 7/10

The Snug – Trying new stuff again, which is something I am really loving, and it went quite well. I got a lot out of the night—not everything I wanted to land landed, but that’s the point of the night. You aren’t supposed to crush. It’s beautiful if you do, but if you don’t, it is expected. 6/10

Ipplepen with The Surgery – This was a pro gig, and it was lovely—in a town hall in the small town of Ipplepen. Lovely room, excellent crowd. 7/10

Belgium and Blues again – Went well again, probably slightly less well than last time. 6/10

Big Squash – I got offered to do a 20, probably ended up doing about 15. The audience had left, and it was mostly just comedians left. Crowd of 4. I went for it anyway. Was very hard to gauge, honestly. I did some new stuff at the end with some members from the LGBT community in there. It was about the community, so it was great to get their feedback, which was all positive. Performance 4/10

Mirth Control – An evening where the venue, I don’t think, had advertised that there would be comedy. I have done the venue a couple of times before, and it has been great, but this time they forgot. Small crowd who were nice, but it was a tough night! 5/10

The Snug again – Went well again. I had a great time. 7/10

Shoulder Bobbers Basingstoke – Big up my man Neil Tarry, who was nice enough to let me headline his show. I just asked for a bit of extra time because of my Fringe show, and he came out guns blazing with a “headline the show”, and I’m happy to say that it went great. In a show with paying customers, it went well, which was a real confidence booster. Big thank you to Neil for doing me a solid! 7/10

Gigglefest – This was a great gig with some great comedians on the lineup. I, however, underperformed, and this was a long ol’ 20 minutes for me as I bombed my way to a fiery shit death! I felt awful—I had been recommended, and I had been paid as a headliner, and I went on and was just dog shit. I was so embarrassed. But these are the gigs where you think… I need to be better than this and, with any luck, set a fire under your arse. 3/10

Jaggers Mirth Control – Lovely gig! I had a good time, and I did well. And it was close to home, which makes a massive difference! 6.5/10

Fat Panda – Started well with a joke about the town, which is something else I am trying to work on. Then, progressively downhill from there! 3/10

And that is it!!!!

Again, I usually do the kiss-arse section, but recently I have been so focused on me and my stuff that I have failed to notice anybody around me!

I did, however, ask Af Marseh to MC for me, and he absolutely crushed it, which was beautiful—so he is the man!

Till next time, guys!